Definitive Guide on How to Balance Personal and Work Relationships


Gerald Buck

For so many people in our economic society, it’s very difficult for many to successfully separate their work life from their home life because they take their work with them wherever they go. For these people, there isn’t a personal life, it’s all about the work.

As a frequent writer and blogger, I’m struggling to balance my personal relationships as I write this.


Balancing Personal and Work Relationships



This is certainly not a healthy way to live but it is also very easy to see why it would happen. There is so much pressure put on the typical 9 to 5 today. In conjunction with an almost jobless recovery and far too many people who are seemingly permanently unemployed, the pressure amounts and the evidence is clear.


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More and more people are turning from simply doing their job and leaving work at the office to becoming full-fledged workaholics.

This guide attempts to target the concepts involved with balancing relationships at home and at work.


Efficiency and How to Balance Personal and Work Relationships

There is a real difference between a hard worker and a workaholic: the hard worker knows when to shut off. They know when to go home at the end of the day and stop working, within their head. On the other hand, the workaholic will just keep plugging away with no regard for their family’s plans.

Years and years built on this mindset can lead to chronic issues at home and subsequently at work.

So how does one keep from being swallowed up by their job to the detriment of their personal life? How can you prevent this from happening to you?

  1. Take breaks from your job to spend with your family. Don’t let anything interfere with these breaks. Make this time sacred and mandatory.
  2. Have a “no work night” at least once a week and every member of the family must turn off their phones, and any other devices.
  3. Be proactive about your schedule. Put the downtime right on your schedule and make sure everyone knows about it – your staff, coworkers and bosses.
  4. Schedule your next family night at the end of this one. Do not say we’ll schedule at a later time. That is a downfall of this idea as most people do not schedule later.

If you aren’t already a strong proponent of this,  you should be. If it’s not scheduled, you probably won’t spend it together. At the very least, make a plan and stick to it.


Building Long Term Relationships

In order to effectively build long term relationships, there are a few key points to know and understand.

  • While at work don’t waste time with activities that will use up both your time and energy without impacting your productivity or getting you closer to going home on time. These activities could include too much socializing, using social media at work, or even taking on more work that is not productive.
  • Many people never make the changes needed to balance their work and personal lives because they think it means making major changes to their lives or even that they have to change who they are. This is not true.
  • Small changes can be enough to carve out that special time for your family. Just insist on coming home on time one evening a week. After several months or even 6 months you can add a second evening every week that you get to go home on time.
  • Avoid the trap of saying or feeling that you can’t afford to take an evening off for yourself because it will just cause you more stress. We convince ourselves that if this project is not done by tomorrow, even when it is due in 3 days, the stress we will feel will be too much for us. The truth is, that in the long run if you don’t take time for your family, your friends and yourself, your stress levels will be even higher.
  • Focus entirely on what you have to accomplish in order to leave on time. Make a to do list and cross items off when they are completed. This will keep you focused and motivated to get done on time.
  • If all of these options have been exhausted, you can even seek additional counseling help. An established practice like Urban Balance, can provide valuable insight into promoting a healthy work and life balance. In some shape or form, everyone struggles with balance, but there is help you can greatly benefit from.

Studies have shown that over working is one of the most consistent causes of marriage and relationships breaking up. There is quite often a breakdown in communication among a couple where one person is working all the time.

The first reason for this is that you have no time for communication because you are not together. You are at work and they are at home. If you are really buried in your work then you are not calling them from work either.

It is likely in this scenario that when you do have time to communicate, the frustration and stress that is built up from the lack of time together spills over into arguments and disagreements with each other.

Another reason that over working can damage your relationship is just that stress that builds up from the state of overworking. You can become grumpy and tired. You have your mind on work all the time. You are not exactly the most carefree and enjoyable person to be around.

Your overworking is just as damaging to the relationship at work as it is at home. Maybe you used to go out with colleagues after work and now you don’t because you feel you have to keep working.

Balance between work and play requires a give and take of time and energy, a push – pull contest is always going on. It can be gracefully done or it can be done kicking and screaming. But if you want a balance in your life you will have to find a way to keep that dance going.

The way I balance my work and personal life may look nothing like the way you balance yours. We each have to do it in our own way and there is no right way. One person might find a time management plan that worked for them while another person might find that multitasking to get the work done quicker was the answer for them.

For another person it might be getting rid of clutter so that the work can get done quicker while the next person is making a commitment to take better care of their non-work relationships.

We all know that if there is one thing that relationships need in order to thrive it is time. Time. We also know that the one thing that overworking steals from us is time.

So if you can steal just a little time back from work for yourself you will be a much happier and much healthier person.

What do you do to help balance work and home relationships? Did we miss anything? Please share with us in the comments below.

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